“Maybe the reason why you can’t embrace god, or embrace the goddess, is because you need to be able to BE embraced by that force. And as you strain to gain it/have it/want it, that force is pushed away. It’s a very ‘yin’ thing; being loved by the force. You can love it, but it’s when it loves you... that’s the main thing. How do you become receptive to that? How do you become feminine enough to receive that wisdom? ”
~ Michael Tsarion
Some things in life are difficult to accept. To accept something, you have to be able to receive it. The word ‘receive’ comes from the Latin recipere, meaning to ‘regain, take back’. Human beings are excellent transmitters and receivers of energy, or ‘givers’ and ‘takers’. I don’t mind admitting that I am (mostly) excellent at broadcasting, but my receptor was a bit dodgy. Yep, I’m using the past tense – as I’ve had an unexpected aerial tweak. Actually, it was more of a metaphorical thwack... sometimes that’s what’s needed to remove particularly stubborn and pernicious obstacles.
Among my very own thoughts are the canniest obstacles I will ever encounter... not from some outside force. Where did these thoughts come from? What made me think I (still) wasn’t ‘good enough’? I’ve been exploring these questions for over 20 years... until last night, when I was ‘thwacked’ and, in that moment, I was finally able to drop what I am not. Enough is enough! I refuse to spend the rest of my life hurting myself, and therefore others.
Rather than feeling jubilant at my liberation, I confess to feeling some regret at how I have wasted those years going around in circles, by being ‘less than’ my Self. (I can let that go, too). A wise sage told me just this Saturday, “It’s the choices you make and the chances you take that determine your future”. I already knew this. The difference is that from now on, those that I make and take will be fully empowered. Watch out! You have been warned :-)
“If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep my Self
I would find a way.”